Fortunately, its from the Onion -- but it sounds way too real!
Recession-Plagued Nation Demands New Bubble To Invest In
A panel of top business leaders testified before Congress about the worsening recession Monday, demanding the government provide Americans with a new irresponsible and largely illusory economic bubble in which to invest.
"What America needs right now is not more talk and long-term strategy, but a concrete way to create more imaginary wealth in the very immediate future," said Thomas Jenkins, CFO of the Boston-area Jenkins Financial Group, a bubble-based investment firm. "We are in a crisis, and that crisis demands an unviable short-term solution."
The current economic woes, brought on by the collapse of the so-called "housing bubble," are considered the worst to hit investors since the equally untenable dot-com bubble burst in 2001. According to investment experts, now that the option of making millions of dollars in a short time with imaginary profits from bad real-estate deals has disappeared, the need for another spontaneous make-believe source of wealth has never been more urgent.
If it wasn't so sad, it would be hysterical . . .
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Source:
Recession-Plagued Nation Demands New Bubble To Invest In
July 14, 2008 Issue 44•29
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/recession_plagued_nation_demands
